I was talking to Kristin the other day and had some pretty interesting ‘revelations’ about myself.  Most of it probably too weird to post on here, but the main thing that stuck out to me is this.  I already know that I am a very ‘black and white’ person.  Meaning, things are either one way or they aren’t.  I’ve always been that way.  It might be  good thing some of the time, but other times it’s really not.  In the case that Kristin and I were talking about it’s more in the ‘not’ category.

See, I realized the other day that I am a ‘justice seeker’.  I need to see something resolved.  I need to see it ‘made to rights’.  And when I don’t, it eats at me.  It’s not that I need to see everything glossed over, but I need to see actual resolve.  And sometimes that never happens.  Sometimes the ‘resolve’ that I’m looking for, or the ‘justice’ that I have in my head isn’t ever going to happen.  And then it sits with me.

I didn’t really realize this about myself until the conversation with Kristin.  I’ve put myself in a place where if something happens to me, or around me, for whatever reason, I can’t shake it until there is “justice”.  Now, when I say that, I’m not saying that I think it’s my job at all to ensure justice.  I’ve never found it my responsibility to chase down evil-doers and make them pay or anything stupid like that.  What I end up doing is just watching and waiting and driving myself nuts until what I feel should happen, happens.

What?!

Since when was it my responsibility to even care about justice?  When did it become my duty, to watch anything followed through in anyone’s life but my own?

Do not repay anyone evil for evil. Be careful to do what is right in the eyes of everyone. If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone. Do not take revenge, my dear friends, but leave room for God’s wrath, for it is written: “It is mine to avenge; I will repay,”says the Lord. On the contrary:

“If your enemy is hungry, feed him; if he is thirsty, give him something to drink. In doing this, you will heap burning coals on his head.”

Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good.  - Romans 12:17-21

There’s some black and white for ya.  Sure.  I’ve seen this verse a thousand times.  And for some reason I’ve never applied it to my situation.  I think it’s because I’m not one to actively ‘go after’ someone, or to “repay evil for evil”, but what is sitting there, waiting for “justice” doing?  Who’s “justice”? Mine?

So yeah.  It’s a pretty weird thing to think about, but how many of us out there are seeking “justice” when we should be seeing to “do right in the eyes of everyone” and let God handle the justice stuff?

Just some light Monday morning thoughts for you.

What do you think?  Are you a justice seeker?