It Hurts Right Here
Today I picked up the baby and then wanted to fall on the floor and cry. Something bad happened. It’s been bugging me a little today and then I put the baby in his highchair and BAM, I was broken. Broken to the point of being short of breath and wanting to cry like a baby.
I wish we had a chiropractor that lived with us. Maybe under the stairs or something. Somewhere not really in the way or anything but maybe we could go to a closet unhook him from a hook and he could fix me. Then I could hang him up again for next time. Though I imagine if I had to hang him up, I run the risk of hurting myself hanging him up, causing me to need to get him down again and that could get annoying. I’d be willing to buy him a step stool or something so he can do get up there himself though. That’s the type of guy I am.
I’m broken somewhere between the middle of my shoulder blades all the way around under my arm and into my chest. Like that picture only I have more hair and the man boob makes it awkward.
Do you ever wish someone would swing you by your feet from the roof and stretch you out? I do.
I picked up the boy today and now my left hip is aching. Is this what it’s like to get old?
You know what helps? A slant board. But they’re a couple hundred bucks. So I lie upside down on the driveway. Works just fine and for free. And the neighbors pretty much leave me alone after that.
if you want I can come over and crack some bones and stuff. I even have one of those little rubber mallets the chiropractors use. Except it’s made out of metal and called a hammer. But we can try it.
I just saw a commercial showing the thing you need. Maybe its the thing Shaun is talking about, I didn’t catch the name though. Basically it flips you upside down and is supposed to be good for your back. The skeptic in me thinks that this puts you in a pretty precarious position for cruel jokes and torture from kids…. but thats just me…
Oh, and if the art subject had more hair I would think that it was this guy
every day. I feel really old now.
Oh man, yes. A live-in chiropractor would be awesome! There are some days when I get this pinched nerve in my neck and I feel like someone poked a flaming needle into my spine.
I feel your pain. Good luck on finding a chiropractor you can hang in the closet. And if you find one, let me know where I can get one.
They just had to draw that. Hope you get stretched or feel better soon!
but why only one man boob… he looks like he is lopsided.